I think everyone experiences an urge for change at some
point in their life. For me, it comes around often, usually when the seasons change
dramatically. When the Summer slowly fades away, turning leaves orange and red
and giving way to icy Autumn rain. Or when the resurrection of the world begins
as Spring breaks through the seemingly perpetual frost of Winter, bringing life,
greenery and the sweet smell of flowers. This is the time of year that I start
to feel a painful, sort of distant aching deep inside, longing for a break from
the mundane routine of mainstream life. As the Earth itself transforms, as the
old seasons melt into new seasons, I feel the deep, burning desire to be a part
of this universal change.
This longing for change is often coupled with a force
from the opposite direction; an exhaustion and boredom for my everyday life
begins to creep up on me. This makes the fantastical freedom of change and travel
even more appealing, and it calls to me like a songbird in a bell jar.
Everything around me appears to be grey. Buildings, homes, cars - even the
faces of people appear to be tainted by an unhealthy grey tinge. This stirs in
me the desire to see colour - to splash bright paint across my world as I leave
the grey behind. This compelling urge for change sticks to me and follows me
everywhere I go. Every corner I turn, I catch a glimpse of the shadow of
desire, and I cannot escape its beckoning call. Whether you feel this as a
longing for the dramatic change of scenery that is travel, or the desire to
move house, repaint the kitchen or end your current relationship, this change
manifests itself in each and every one of us.
Impermanence is a permanent thing, and we shouldn't spend
our lives looking for a direction that will stay the same, because change is
what the human spirit desires, relishes and grows upon. As human beings, we are
the very definition of fleetingness and transience; why not embrace this
universal destiny? There are so many directions in which the path can lead; why
limit yourself to just one? Searching for a direction in a state of constant
change is natural, and perhaps even necessary. But it is paramount to
understand that this direction will not stay the same forever, and that this
isn't a bad thing; it is in fact wonderful and necessary. Choosing one path to
devote yourself to is like picking up one book in a library of thousands, and
reading only this one book for the rest of your life. There are so many
beautiful stories to discover on these many different paths. To live such a
life of many paths and stories in to live as a seed on the wind, knowing no
permanent direction, accepting and feeling all that can be experienced. It is
my belief that to live like this is to live in a state of true acceptance and
beauty, and to live a life of fulfilment and bliss.
So when this longing for change rears its head, we
mustn't ignore it. Often we know that it isn't the right time to suddenly drop
everything and jump on a plane to New Zealand, and so we must be patient until
the time for change is right. But if this aching is something you know you must
address, then let nothing stand in your way. Change is natural, and it is
something that must happen. In this mainstream, materialistic society, change
is not often acknowledged as imperative, as our lifestyles often don't support
it. But that doesn't make it wrong. If you don't fit into mainstream society,
you're doing something right. Do what makes you happy, and welcome the change
you crave.